Monday, August 31, 2009

Day 2 of juice cleanse.

Last night shortly before I settled in for bed I started getting REALLY emotional. I believe this detox is bringing about all sorts of interesting things. I know it seems really fast to be experiencing such emotional side effects from the detox but like I stated in my previous post, I feel I am pushing this detox on my body rather quickly. 

I have been doing to reading on some of my favorite Raw forums about detox and what it can do emotionally. There seems to be a lot of people who suffer pretty extreme emotions while doing some kind of detox program. What's funny is that I was reading these forums a day BEFORE I started and thought to myself  'that seems weird, maybe these people are going through something else because it doesn't seem like a very plausible explanation'. Well I was wrong and now find myself all sorts of down. The last 24 hours I have been doing nothing about doubting pretty much everything. My decision to move back down to California, my relationship (which is damn amazing I might add), my future career moves...everything. When I did my reading on other's stories I noticed they all had a theme. They didn't seem depressed as a whole, they were past feeling that maybe weren't resolved, like relationships. Mine doesn't have anything to do with past relationships of any kind rather more feeling upset about my accomplishments or lack thereof so far.... then wondering where the relationship fits into me getting me, to where I need to be! In a sense I like feeling like this and I feel it's an opportunity for me to really figure some things out and start making a plan. I have communicated all of my 'downs' with my boyfriend so he is always in the loop and we are going to use this to our advantage to create a timeline for us and ourselves (Told you he was great).

Besides the emotional aspect of this juicing, things seem to be going alright. Not good, not bad, just alright. Being away from food is never a great time for me. I love it too much and it is such a staple in my everyday life. It almost seems as if my entire day is planed somehow around food. Making sure I get some good food going for my boyfriend as well as myself. Being how I am raw I do take a good while to prepare my food so between that and cooking al three meals for him, my days is full! I don't mind it fact I love it. 

I have been taking my time in writing this all day and now that it is 7pm, I must say, I am going to prepare myself some raw pasta. We have been in and out of the house nearly all day and I honestly cant deal with the mood swings I have. Someone weird came out while doing this and I don't like them! It's not fair for my boyfriend as well. The poor guy has just been dealing with this monster. 

I am not going to beat myself up about it. I have ALOT of things going on in my life right now... primarily transitional and I take pride in the fact that I at least eat Raw. Eating Raw in itself is a major detoxifying way of life so I will take with me that knowledge and move forward. When my life seems a little more 'stable' I will work on a cleanse I know I can follow through with. If I am not there emotionally I feel I can not 100% benefit from the results. Things have to be lined up!

Thats all for now,


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